Sunday, July 17, 2011

A Wise Man Once Tweeted...

'Hipstamatic is autotune for photos.' Tweeted by @ (Alec Sulkin) on the 9th of April 2011. I've been holding onto this tweet for ages, wanting to write something about it...

The Sulk is too damn right. Thanks to the hipstamatic* app even a photo of a prune can now be deemed arty. And we all know prunes are the most un-sexiest of fruits. If I had an iPhone I'd take a photo of said prune to prove my point but I don't so instead, please accept this photo of a toilet to show you what I mean. 

* Side note observation: the app is appropriately named if you think about it. After all, it's the hipster's number one accomplice to portraying a quirky image, i.e. here's a hipstamatic photo of me sitting in a book shop, sipping a macchiato, stroking my beard. Here's a hipstamatic photo of me doing a wacky pose in an art gallery etc.

The crapper. It's totes pomo 'n shit, man.

Saturday, July 16, 2011


Happy weekend Internet! How are you spending it? I'm snuggled up in my favourite place in the world (the couch), clocking up some serious hours on my derriere having and an Inbetweeners marathon with my brosephs. I'm also declaring it the Official Weekend of the Pyjama and will not be getting out of mine til Monday (rest assured, I do change into fresh jammies everyday). 

In celebration of these two glorious days of slothness and to get you in the mood for a little festival coming up, I highly recommend you listen to this Splendour mix-tape. I've been playing it all morning and cannot control my toe tapping. Thanks to the kind folk at Sosueme you can download it for nada. Nothing. Zilch! here or stream it below.  

Only 2 more weeks to go. Oh my, I'm excited. There's only one thing to do. POST-PHOTOS-OF-ED-MCFARLANE-TIME! The lead singer of Friendly Fires is quite possibly the hottest human being on earth. Did I mention he boasts the most enviable collection of Hawaiian shirts and has dance moves that would put Michael Jackson to shame? One day he will be mine. Oh yes, he will be mine. 

Yes. Those are zebras on his shirt. Marry me?

SOSUEME IN THE GRASS 2011 by Falcona

Ps. many thanks to Amy Stuchbury for these photos. She papped the aforementioned Ed at Glastonbury a few weeks ago. Droolz.

Rad or Ridic?

Is it wrong that I kinda wanna get the Steve Buscemi dress, by Aussie designers Black Milk? It's creepy, yet surprisingly cool. Or maybe I'm just being fooled by the bangin' model who would probably look good with poo smeared on her face. 

For those of you not familiar with the interweb phenomenon, Chicks With Steve Buscemi Eyes, click here and strap yourselves in for some serious ROFLz.

And while we're on Creep Street, how do we feel about this Evian baby tee? The concept behind their latest campaign is drinking water makes you feel young. You know what else is young? Babies. Go figure. It's somewhat of a tenuous link but they're calling it the Evian live young experience, which can be all yours for the reasonable price of $60. With the right styling, I reckon you could totally pull this off. 

Thoughts? Feelings? Would you wear either of these novel creations? 

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Mama Didn't Raise no Fool

ME: Whoo, we're home alone! We can do what we want!

JB: Most cool kids would have parties, but I'm gonna stay up late and play video games.

Saturday, July 9, 2011

The Splendour in the Grass Diorama-rama-off 2011

What started as a drunken joke, has evolved into a fully fledged competition. There's nothing I enjoy more than a yee old dual. Inspired from the 'my car's a unicorn, what's yours?' game, where Splendour punters are invited to dress their cars up,(FYI ours will be sporting a moustache) Nathan and I will be having our very own face off, through the long-lost art of dioramas. Our email banter explains more...
ME: Hello competitor, hope you are well*. Just thought I’d outline the terms and conditions of the official Splendour diorama-rama-off-2011. Please feel free to contribute if I have missed something. The rules -

  • Judging will take place the day of departure, Thursday the 28th of July. Contestants must bring their dioramas with them on the trip.
  • The judging panel will consist of the Splendour crew. Although this crew is complied of friends, these friends must judge dioramas objectively on creative merit, artistic integrity, originality and relevance to competition theme. Monetary and / or food bribes (i.e. lifetime supply of Pie Face / Mad Mex / Guzmen and Gomez if you swing that way) will result in immediate expulsion from the competition.
  •  The dioramas must embrace the theme of ‘Splendour in the Grass 2011.’
  • A regular sized shoe box is only allowed. No fancy pants big cardboard boxes are permitted. 
  • There will be no external help whatsoever. That means using no sisters who are clever art teachers, brothers who are engineers and can make cool explosions or interns and work experience kids with a handy knack for crochet and knitting – it must be made with your hands only.
  • Contestants have until the 28th of July to complete their project and may begin now.
* Not really. I hope you’re coming down with a crippling finger disease that riddles your diorama making digits disabled.

NATHAN: Greetings fellow competitor! I too, hope that you are well*. I'm happy with the rules outlined below, but I think the judging should take place at the house, where we can put our fine works of art on full display and the (10) judges can take their time to look over our creative treasures. The winner should be announced prior to leaving for the first day of the festival. This will allow sufficient "in your face" gloating opportunities for the winner, whilst providing a full evening of critique from our peers.

Tools down on 28th of July though, prior to departure. I agree that assembly must be by our own hand, but what of creative input and sound boarding? Are we able to run ideas past our friends or is that a no-no? May the best diorama-er win!
* I also secretly hope that your delicate diorama fingers are hideously disfigured in a freak accident involving piano fall board (the lid that covers the keys), car doors or angry mobsters with ball peen hammers -- Nathan.

ME: Hey chump, valid ideas – you're right, more exciting to judge the first morning of Splendour! Then way more time to boast etc. And yes, no sneaky editing in the car ride up there. 

I am concerned that there’s 10 judges – we need an uneven number, what happen if it’s 5 all? How would we settle it? I think it’s fine to bounce creative ideas off buddies. 

Haha I can't believe this is actually happening, so excited - not enough arts and crafts in the community I say. BRING BACK THE DIORAMA! Totes going to Lincraft this weekend. AB
NATHAN: We can easily work 9 judges. My friend Adam is just chillin' in the house and not actually going to the festival, so he can be removed from the 'Splendour Crew'. Odd numbers now, with a clear winner - me.
I think that's the rules sorted. I've got my shoe box (normal size), so we're all good to go. Arts and crafts should not be limited to those under 10. We're doing our bit to bring fun back to the masses. *high five*.  Good luck. 
UPDATE: since this communication, we have agreed our dioramas must be presented with a 1 minute speech, primary school style. Ohhh yeah! Bring it on!

Watch your back Nate Dog.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Black-Rimmed Glasses and I'm all Yours

It doesn't take much to impress me... Probably the number one way to make me swoon. Hot nerds are where it's at. Please note: hipsters who wear glasses without an actual need for them, can frock off. 

Saturday, July 2, 2011

This is Why I Love You

James' RSVP to an event... 

Cutest. Thing. Ever.

At the bank yesterday waiting in line when the sweet old man behind me says, 'my, that dress is pretty! It takes me back to the 50s. The colour looks great on you.' BLESS YOUR COTTON SOCKS. You sir, just made my day. 

It was said in the most sincere way. He wasn't hitting on me, it was just like a grandfather giving his his granddaughter a compliment. I wish I could have given him a cuddle and had a cup of tea with him. 

Man, I love old people. 
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