Thursday, December 9, 2010

Another Reason I'd Like to be a Boy

Besides the obvious things like not having to worry about hair removal or giving birth, as I've lamented in the past, I think it would be sweet to be a dude. Not because I have any gender confusion issues but sometimes being a boy just seems much easier. I'd especially like to be a boy this summer. Why? Because the boardies this season are mighty fine!


I'd seriously contemplate pretending to be a boy for a day, purely so I could wear a pair of trendy threads. Every time I go shopping I end up lusting after them. There's heaps of cool prints, pastels, tye dyes and florals out there. But all with a masculine, stylish twist. Nothing's sexier than a fashionable boy, especially at the beach! So if you want to catch eyes this summer, here are some quick tips - 


BOARD SHORT DOs 
  • Please go for the shorter style of boardies, but not so short that you're wearing Euro trunks. Just like skinny leg jeans are the must have style of pantaloons, the short-board-short is the must have style of cossie. Mid thigh is the areas we're aiming for. Think you'll look like a dick head? Think again. You'll look like more of a dick head wearing daggy, long army print boardies, now excuse me while I point and laugh at your lack of style. 
  • Hawaiian print has been revived so as long as it's not the 90's style Ockaniue, go for it! 
  • Digital print is THE thing for this season, get on board.   
Retro Hawaiian prints, yum!

BOARD SHORT DONTs
  • Nothing's more of a turn off than long, below the knee boardies. 
  • Dick stickers: don't even get me started. Yo, we're not in the 90's anymore, sort that shit out. 
  • Aussie flag boardies are a big no no.
  • One should never purchase anything with offensive lightening bolts, skulls or other naff images. Volcom and Hot Tuna branding should be avoided too. Unless you're 7 years old. 
  • Don't be scared to try something new. Say goodbye to Mr Boring. Want to stand out? Wear a crazy print. Or even a crazy, pink print. Who said pink is just for girls?
  • Electro is dead, it passed away circa 2007 so tuck those fluros back in the draw.


Pink is extremely hot on boys

So if I was a boy, where would I be buying my boardies? From an awesome little shop called Toggs. Check it out here. And that's a genuine endorsement, I saw their ad in Frankie and couldn't get over how cool their stuff is. You can order online too! Happy shopping boys. And girls who wish they were boys, purely so they can reap the fashion benefits. 

2 comments:

  1. Plus if you buy them from Incu sexy boys will serve you

    ReplyDelete
  2. Don't be a boy, ur a hot girl.

    ReplyDelete

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