ME: What are you doing the next few weekends?
JAMES: My friend's having a party soon and the theme is Gossip Girl.
ME: Cool! Can I please style you? I'm thinking slicked back hair, blazer, bow-tie, white fitted shirt... Very New York chic.
JAMES: No freaking way. I'm just going to wear normal clothes and then stick a sign on my t-shirt that says "douche".