Sunday, May 30, 2010

Singlet Tops Are Not Dresses!

Dear People who wear singlet tops as dresses, please don't. It's a burden on the community. I don't think you realise how much stress it causes us worrying if we'll accidentally be exposed to something we don't want to see. A sneaky nip slip here, or an arse cheek there.

It's great you have such body confidence, but why not embrace that by wearing some AWESOME CLOTHES that actually cover your bits and flatter your bod?

This singlet-top-as-dress-phenomenon is sweeping the nation, and it needs to be stopped. The next time you see a singlet top clad chick, please whisk her away to the nearest shop and buy her some emergency pants. You can claim this back as a tax deductible charity donation through my new foundation, Pants for the Pantless.

But if you're really adamant on being a Pantless Citizen, then at least do it with a leotard a la Lady Gaga.

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